It seems that Jimmy-Boy Martin, LGBTQXYZ∞SJ, has published a new book. Eccles has a bit of fun.
From Eccles is Saved
Already they're calling the Book of the Century - Fr James "Jimbo" Martin LGBTQSJ has another blockbuster in press. You can tell the quality of it by the celebrity endorsements on the cover:
Blase Cupich, world's worst cardinal, and avoider of rabbit holes that may contain awkward rabbits: This should be the ideal handbook for anyone wishing to influence vulnerable people. They may have been brought up as Catholics, but their gut feeling is for the "Seamless Trousers" approach to the faith: you can't be pro-life unless you support the venerable Joseph Biden and the blessed Kamala Harris. We need to encourage this version of Catholicism.
Robert Barron, body-builder, part-time bishop, "Word on Fire" managing director, and friend of Uncle Wilt Gregory: The book takes a very sensitive approach to the formation of LGBT Catholics. Many teenagers wonder whether they are really heterosexual: indeed, seeing photos of Alexandra Occasional-Cortex flashing her teeth can put young boys off women for life. Fr Jim knows that these boys should be encouraged to "come out" as Jesuits. But "preying" isn't the right word, I prefer "encouraging young people to recognise their tendency to do whatever they want, and accept it as something to celebrate."
But no endorsement from Joe Tobin? What went wrong?
We have not yet read the book, but we do hope that Fr James will explain how to persuade people to accept reinterpretations of scripture. It's scandalous that vulnerable Catholics should rely on old-fashioned readings of the Bible as handed down by the Church for 2000 years. What they need is a nice friendly uncle to sit down with them and explain that the Bible means something entirely different in the 21st Century. I'm hoping to get some tips on this - when I knock on doors offering to tell people about how Jesus learned his job from a Canaanite woman and entrusted the Church to Mary Magdalene, they just throw rotten fruit at me.
Would it help if I dressed up as a sexy priest?
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