University Of Kansas Labels 'My Pleasure' As Hate Speech

This is satire, but KU (and Lawrence) have historically been 'woke'. When the anarchist, Emma Goldman, visited Kansas she said there were only three 'oases of liberalism' in the State. They were 1) Girard, a socialist governed city, and the home of the 'Appeal to Reason', at the time the largest socialist weekly paper in the world, 2) Wichita, a hotbed (then, but not by the 1950s!) of socialism and anarchism, and the site of one of the first 'Palmer Raids' in 1919, and 3) Lawrence the home of the University of Kansas.

When I was a student there in the early 1970s, when I would go home to visit my folks, my friends in Marysville, my hometown, would ask me, 'What the hell is going on at that commie school in Lawrence?

From The Babylon Bee

LAWRENCE, KS—The University of Kansas has labeled the phrase "my pleasure" as hate speech after students were triggered during a visit to a campus Chick-fil-A. According to reports, one staff member approached a group of students seventeen times during their half-hour visit, just to check on them.

"He just kept coming over to us like we needed something," said senior Kelly Davis. "I'm an adult, I don't need help refilling my soda. That is, unless my mom comes to visit. She usually does that for me, I guess. This guy though, he just seemed too happy to be at work."

The worst part, according to the students, was every time the staff member walked away from the table, he said "my pleasure" in response to their requests, as if he actually enjoyed his job. This set the students off so bad that they eventually left their food at the table and walked to the counselor's office, crying. Other students reported that the staff member quickly cleaned up the mess, packaged the food in case the students returned, and said "my pleasure" to nobody in particular.

The reason the students were so upset can be attributed to school curriculum concerning employment. According to the University of Kansas, the definition of work is, "a task one is forced to do at gunpoint for a capitalist."  The university defines pleasure as "enjoyment and entertainment; not done out of necessity for a capitalist or fascist." This seems to indicate that Chick-fil-A employees genuinely enjoy doing their job for a fascist capitalist (and likely, racist).

"Only a fascist Christian would actually enjoy their job," a school counselor claimed. "This is the root of fascism and hate. You see these people at work, they greet you, they say 'welcome to Chick-fil-A, my pleasure.' They enjoy it. Never in my ten plus years at this university have I met one student who actually enjoyed their job, let alone their career choice. It's just wrong. These hateful words should be banned."

The University of Kansas had no choice but to outright ban the phrase "my pleasure" due to its origins in Christian fascism. Students praised the decision by packing up their anti-Chick-fil-A signs and going back to the dorms to sleep off their hangovers. Chick-fil-A is currently working on rephrasing their greetings to better suit their Kansas comrades.