Christian Modesty
1. We are told that one day in the presence
of St. Francis de Sales the beauty of a certain noble lady, his cousin,
was being described. (Spirito P. VII, c. 10) The Saint described with
simplicity: “I’ve heard this said by others also.” Somebody remarked
that he himself often saw this young relative of his and therefore there
was no need for others to tell him about her. The Saint replied with
the same holy simplicity: “It is true that I see her often, but I never
stare at her.” This simple but wise reply underlines the difference
between seeing and looking.
We are often obliged, in the ordinary
course of living or by reason of our position, to see many things which
could be dangerous to our spiritual welfare. There are many ugly things
around us, although sometimes externally beautiful, which we cannot
help seeing. At home, on the street, in society, almost everywhere, we
meet persons and things which constitute a threat to our virtue. What
are we to do? We must see, because very often we cannot help it, but we
must never stare.
In other words, we should never fix our eyes on
anything which would seriously disturb us. If we experience the
beginnings of any such disturbance we should look elsewhere at once,
raising our minds to God in silent prayer. Delay could cost us our
purity. To guard it we need the holy virtue of modesty, which St. Thomas
calls the moderating virtue. (Summa Theologiae, II-II, q. 160, a. 1)
Not only, the Angelic Doctor observes, does it moderate, but it also
directs our internal actions as well as our external ones, in such a way
that he who possesses this beautiful virtue has perfect control over
his outward behaviour and over his inward dispositions (Ibid., q. 160,
a. 2).
2. It follows from the doctrine of St. Thomas that modesty has two aspects, internal and external.
The former, which is the foundation of the latter, consists in a firm
resolution, relying on divine grace, of preserving constant
self-control, so that it will be impossible to think or do anything
contrary to the law of God. Since everything in us will be directed
towards God, it will impossible for us to be led astray through the
lower impulses of the flesh or through the external appearances of
persons and objects surrounding us. Once the virtue of modesty has been
perfectly developed, the control which we exercise over our interior
faculties will be reflected in our external behaviour. This outward
expression is the necessary complement of interior modesty. Let us
examine ourselves and see if we are really modest, both internally and
externally, for this lovely virtue is the most solid foundation and the
best safeguard of sanctity.
3. The virtue of modesty is necessary
in that it regulates all our actions, internal and external, and saves
us from everything which threatens the purity of our souls. It is also
an inspiring example to the people around us. The Saints often converted
sinners and incited others to lead better lives simply because their
conduct proclaimed their purity and sanctity. We should endeavour to do
the same, without affectation however, but in a simple and natural
manner. The continual mastery which we exercise over our interior and
exterior faculties should be reflected in our appearance, in our
conversation, and in all our actions.
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