Online Wills Can Get You Killed (or Worse)

An attorney points out the dangers of "living wills", which is why I recommend using a form such as this from Jeff Cassman or this from the Pennsylvania Catholic Conference.

From Crisis

By Joseph E. Cavello, Esq.

Many “Do-It-Yourself” legal platforms exclude health-care proxy appointment or advance directives—fairly nuanced and state-specific documents—which are arguably the most important elements in any estate plan.

Legal Disclaimer: The opinions expressed below are the personal views of the author and are not intended to reflect the official position of the author’s law firm, clients, or any affiliated entity. This article is for general informational purposes only and does not constitute legal, financial, or medical advice, nor does it create an attorney-client relationship. Readers should consult a qualified attorney regarding their specific situation. While the case elements discussed in this article are real, names and other sensitive information have been altered to protect client privacy.

“Ithink I killed my wife.”
Minutes into our first meeting, my new client, John, broke down sobbing.
His adult daughter, Tess, tried in vain to comfort him, quietly leaning toward me. With pain in her eyes, she admitted: “I was very uncomfortable with how it all happened. That’s why we’re here.”
As an estate planning attorney, I serve clients and families through major life transitions. It is among the most rewarding aspects of my profession. Beyond the legal work, our team often shares moral support and ethical guidance as well, and we have learned that the most difficult challenge many Catholics ever face is making decisions about end-of-life medical care.
The conversation that followed Tess’ admission was not about taxes, asset transfer, Medicaid, or probate timelines. It was about the agony of yet another family that learned too late and had been caught unprepared with inadequate documents and no legal counsel rooted in Church teaching. It was about how fear and clinical pressure prevailed, leading John to “pull the plug” on his merely injured wife of 30 years who should have lived to see grandchildren play.
His wife did not die because of malice. She died a victim of misconstrued “mercy,” ignorance about the true shape of American legal and medical systems, and the cold calculus of financial expediency. Above all, she died because there was no trusted advocate with legal authority to intervene—and no valid advance directive setting moral limitations on her medical care.
Sadly, her case is increasingly common.
Over 70 percent of U.S. adults have no Will, and more than half have no estate planning documents of any kind.1 With that kind of service gap, people are being told to “just get a Will done.” That, in turn, leads to online platforms promising speed, simplicity, and low prices. This is not necessarily a bad place to begin, but in the absence of a direct relationship with a trusted attorney, these platforms can become impersonal vending machines: dispensing a false sense of security along with their templated documents, some of which are not even valid apart from attorney signature.
Over 70 percent of U.S. adults have no Will, and more than half have no estate planning documents of any kind.Tweet This
Most troubling is the fact that many “Do-It-Yourself” legal platforms exclude health-care proxy appointment or advance directives—fairly nuanced and state-specific documents—which are arguably the most important elements in any estate plan. This leaves many people convinced that a basic Will is “good enough” for the responsible Catholic. I disagree.
By only creating a Will, we address only post-death matters, leaving loved ones exposed to the stress of probate court after death and—far more seriously—dangerously unprepared for the more likely scenario: incapacity while living. In doing so, we omit our moral duty to care for the temple of our body through advance planning (see 1 Corinthians 6:19-20). Illness, accident, pregnancy, surgery, dementia, mental breakdown and other causes will render most adults unable to direct their own care at some point.2 To address this, serious Catholics should keep an updated estate plan with valid powers of attorney, HIPAA authorization, and advance medical directives that align with Church teaching.
Some assume their state’s default form will suffice or that doctors will “do the right thing” when the time comes, especially at a faith-based care facility. But default forms are not built from Catholic moral reasoning, and clinical pressures are real, no matter what name is on the building.
Recent years and “public health crises” forced many to learn this the hard way, and state-standard advance directives have led to outcomes people never imagined: withdrawal of food and water, terminal sedation, or even the quiet redefinition of death to facilitate premature organ harvesting. Moral silence here is not neutrality. These moments shape the fate of souls—of patients, their loved ones, and their medical providers.
In our age of electronic medical records, I regularly see clients who are surprised to find that they already have a problematic advance directive on file. As these forms are frequently completed at a license branch or routine doctor visit without second thought, I expect many are in this same situation.
The specter of AI in American health care introduces another concern. Few are legally prepared for the emerging techno-future in which algorithms are already starting to determine medical diagnoses, treatment, and even funding. Medicine is becoming more automated, and patients with no plan for legally protecting their data will face a time when their digital likeness survives them in an interminable and uncontrollable “digital afterlife.”
Virtual clones for AI system training, memorials, therapy, and otherwise are already on offer. “Griefbots” like Seance, Re;memory, and Versona promise users an avatar that will live forever rather than allow the dead to rest in peace. A robust estate plan should include clear legal provisions about using your image, likeness, and data after your death.
Furthermore, the Catholic tradition of ethical decision-making in health care is very precise, with key distinctions between ordinary versus extraordinary measures, legitimate pain control versus excessive sedation, and allowing death versus hastening it. These judgments are case-specific and depend on intentions, circumstances, and principles that can never be captured by checkboxes or algorithms.
This is why an attorney who shares your values will stress the importance of a Catholic health-care proxy: legally appointing someone you know and trust, who understands your care goals against the backdrop of Church teaching, and is prepared to speak for you in the medical setting. Additionally, a professional health-care advocate—someone trained in Catholic ethics and familiar with your wishes and family dynamics—can be a highly valuable support.
My client John did not lack genuine concern for his wife. He lacked preparation.
He assumed that reliable guidance would appear when the time came. That assumption is common and increasingly dangerous. It is imperative that we avoid the same mistake, recalling that Catholics have always prayed against an unprovided death. Thankfully, this is one prayer we can answer for ourselves through preparation.
Today, the choice is between responsible stewardship or presumptive omission; between leaving loved ones with clear guidance and legal counsel or leaving them alone in a time of crisis—often simply because we intended to “get to it later.” The path forward is clear: find a trusted attorney to create or review your estate plan to align with your personal and family goals and reflect your Faith.
The life—the soul—you save may be your own.