Making fun of the 'Social Justice' Stations of the Cross.
From Heather from the Archdiocesan Office of Marriage and Family Life.
Dear friends in the Kingdom of Light! We ask you all to join with us in solidarity and pray the Social Justice Stations of the Cross, which were just approved by Papa Francis Himself and blessed by none other than our beloved Fr. Jim RainbowStole! So get your yoga mats, light your incense sticks, and let the spirit of the pre-Easter season enlighten your mind!
1. Jesus is Condemned to Death. We pray for all persons who are forced to use bathrooms that do not accommodate their desired gender.
2. Jesus Accepts His Cross. We pray for all the innocent animals in our world who live with a constant dread of being slaughtered for meat.
3. Jesus Falls the First Time. We pray for all the women who have tried and failed to break the glass ceiling.
4. Jesus Meets His Mother. We pray for all women who are forced to stay home, cook and clean, and care for their children instead of seeking a fulfilling career in the real world.
5. Simon Helps Jesus Carry the Cross. We pray for a universal basic income for all labourers and those unwilling to work.
6. Veronica Wipes the Face of Jesus. We pray for all the oppressed female workers in Chinese factories that made our Lulu Lemon yoga pants.
7. Jesus Falls a Second Time. We pray for all those persons who cannot afford gender reassignment surgery and hormone therapy.
8. Jesus Speaks to the Women of Jerusalem. We pray that all vegans will be respected for the joy and diversity they bring our culture.
9. Jesus Falls a Third Time. We pray for the restoration of all forests demolished by greedy capitalists trying to make a buck selling toilet paper.
10. Jesus is Stripped of His Garments. We pray for a greater respect of the Muslim burqa worldwide.
11. Jesus is Nailed to the Cross. We pray to be forgiven for expressing our white privilege.
12. Jesus Dies on the Cross. We pray for all the migrants who are denied access to free healthcare, free vehicles, and free gym memberships.
13. Jesus is Taken Down from the Cross. We pray for a greater awareness of our carbon footprint.
14. Jesus is a Laid in the Tomb. We pray that all gluten free persons will be accepted by our society.
15. HE IS RISEN!!!! ALLELUIA!!! Go have a Cadbury egg!!!
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Comments are subject to deletion if they are not germane. I have no problem with a bit of colourful language, but blasphemy or depraved profanity will not be allowed. Attacks on the Catholic Faith will not be tolerated. Comments will be deleted that are republican (Yanks! Note the lower case 'r'!), attacks on the legitimacy of Pope Francis as the Vicar of Christ (I know he's a material heretic and a Protector of Perverts, and I definitely want him gone yesterday! However, he is Pope, and I pray for him every day.), the legitimacy of the House of Windsor or of the claims of the Elder Line of the House of France, or attacks on the legitimacy of any of the currently ruling Houses of Europe.