8 April, Antonio, Cardinal Bacci: Meditations for Every Day

The Repentance of St. Peter

1. Peter had denied his Master three times. He was standing in the courtyard of the High Priest warming himself before a brazier and not even thinking of the depths to which he had descended. Jesus, calumniated, struck and mocked as if He were criminal, forgets altogether about Himself. Moved by compassion for the leader of His Apostles, now become a perjurer, He turns His gaze towards him. Peter is jerked back to his senses by this look, which is at the same time stern and affectionate. He realises at last the level to which he has fallen. He is stricken to the heart and feels a sudden tightness in his throat. “And Peter went out and wept bitterly.” (Luke 22:62)

Peter saw clearly at this stage the chasm into which he had fallen. He thought of all the gifts and favours which he had received from Jesus and recalled the prophecy which his Master had made. “A cock will not crow this day, until thou hast denied three times that thou knowest me.” (Luke 22:34) He remembered also how he had sworn that he would never deny Jesus. Now he saw himself in the role of the prodigal son or the lost sheep... and as he wept bitterly he saw again the reproachful yet loving gaze of Jesus. His grief found an outlet in his tears and he was filled with confidence that Jesus in His infinite goodness would forgive him. If we should fall (as we often do, unfortunately), let us rise again immediately as Peter did. Let us weep for our sins and kneeling before Jesus, represented by the priest, let us confess our faults and tell God that we shall never offend Him again.

2. When Peter realised how wretchedly he had fallen, the first thing which he did was to escape from the occasion of sin. “Peter went out.” (Luke 22:62) He grieved for his three sins not only on that sad night but throughout his life. St. Clement writes that he wept so often that his tears wore two deep furrows in his cheeks and that whenever he heard the cock crowing, the cry pierced his heart. He loved Jesus sincerely and passionately. When he was asked three times if he loved Him, he replied humbly: “Lord, thou knowest that I love thee.” (Cf. John 21:16) Can we say these same words to Jesus with equal sincerity and humility? If we really love Jesus as Peter did, and are prepared to face death for His sake as Peter was, then we may be sure that we shall never offend God again.

3. Two of the Apostles sinned seriously. Peter denied Jesus and Judas betrayed Him. Both regretted their offence, but Peter's was the repentance of love and that of Judas was the remorse of despair. Judas also admitted his fault. “I have sinned,” he said, “in betraying innocent blood.” (Mt. 27:4) He flung the thirty pieces of silver, which he received as a reward for his crime, into the temple. But he did not return to Jesus, Who had even called him His friend at the time of the betrayal. He did not trust in His infinite goodness, but went away in despair and hanged himself with a halter from a tree. Let us adore the mystery of the providence and mercy of God, but let us remember that we are lost if we abuse it. Our next sin could be the last which we should have the opportunity of committing. If God did not grant us the grace to repent, we could end in the manner of Judas rather than that of Peter. Let us think earnestly about this and form new resolutions with sincerity and humility.