Things Our Lady Did Not Say — and Neither Should We

Our Lady should be a model for all Catholics. She is the sole custodian of God's treasures and the sole dispenser of His graces.

From Aleteia

By Sarah Robsdottir

Mary has 188 words recorded in Scripture. She didn't explain or defend herself because Truth was growing within her. And in time, this Truth would be revealed.

Hail, Full of Grace ...." (Luke 1:28)

When the Angel Gabriel greets Mary in the book of Luke, he doesn't greet her by name. He calls her "Kecharitomene," which is a perfect-tense Greek term meaning "You who have been perfected by grace ... and remain so." Not “partially graced,” not “highly favored,” but completely filled with God’s grace. 

So, if we're looking for a sinless example of how to respond to life's many difficulties, let us turn to Our Lady.  

Angelo Stagnaro at The National Catholic Register counted the 188 recorded words Mary spoke in seven instances of Sacred Scripture.

1LUKE 1:34

At the Annunciation, Mary said to the angel, “How shall this be, since I have no husband?”

(9 words in which she asked a question.)

2LUKE 1:38

“Behold, I am the handmaid of the Lord,” said Mary, again at the Annunciation. “Let it be to me according to your word” And the angel left her.

(17 words in which she consented to be the Mother of Our Lord.)

3LUKE 1:40

At the Visitation, Mary greeted her cousin St. Elizabeth but her words aren’t recorded.

(0 words)

4LUKE 1:46

The Magnificat:

“My soul magnifies the Lord, and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior, for he has regarded the low estate of his handmaiden. For behold, henceforth all generations will call me blessed; for he who is mighty has done great things for me, and holy is his name. And his mercy is on those who fear him from generation to generation. He has shown strength with his arm, he has scattered the proud in the imagination of their hearts, he has put down the mighty from their thrones, and exalted those of low degree; he has filled the hungry with good things, and the rich he has sent empty away. He has helped his servant Israel, in remembrance of his mercy, as he spoke to our fathers, to Abraham and to his posterity for ever.”

(135 words in which she glorified God and humbly celebrated her role in salvation history.)

5LUKE 2:48

Our Lord’s parents were astonished when they saw him at the Temple, and his mother said to him, “Son, why have you treated us so? Behold, your father and I have been looking for you anxiously.”

(18 words in which she asked a question and honestly expressed her frustrations without complaining.)

6JOHN 2:3

When the wine had given out at Cana, Jesus’ mother said to him, “They have no wine.”

(4 words in which she came to Our Lord with a problem.)

7JOHN 2:5

Again at Cana, Jesus’ mother then told the servants, “Do whatever he tells you.”

(5 words in which she directs us to her Son.)

What she did not say

This particular holiday season, my biggest take-away from these 188 words spoken in Scripture by Our Lady is a reflection on the things she did not say. 

She never complained. She never explained or defended herself. She didn't freak out on Gabriel -- as I certainly would have, turning pink in the face and spastically sputtering something like, "Don't you know I could get stoned for being pregnant out of wedlock???" 

Instead, Mary "treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart." (Luke 2:19)

I have been thinking about this a lot lately because I'm dealing with a distant relative, and the relationship is very stressful. I often feel that I am being treated unfairly, falsely accused, and totally misunderstood. 

In these moments, it's my tendency to over explain and defend myself. But Our Lady never did this, even though she had good reason. She never ran to St. Joseph or anyone else and begged them to understand her perpetual virginity. She didn't go around building herself up, proclaiming her innocence, and blabbing about what the angel told her.

When she greeted her cousin Elizabeth, her actual words were not recorded, so I think it's safe to say she didn't use very many of them. 

Rather, Our Lady hardly said a thing in Scripture and perhaps said little in real life. I like to think she didn't have to. She carried the Truth within her, and in time this Truth would be revealed.