Marie de Saint-Exupéry, the Grandmother of 'The Little Prince'

I am ashamed to admit that I've never read The Little Prince, but I've just downloaded it and I shall! Its author's mother sounds fascinating.

From Aleteia

By Raphaëlle Coquebert

The life of the mother of famous author Antoine de Saint-Exupéry started like a fairy tale then took a dark turn — but she followed the light of hope and faith.

The year 2025 marks the 80th anniversary of Antoine de Saint-Exupéry's death. This is an opportunity to discover the mother of the aviator-poet. She is little known to the general public but deserves to step out of the shadows. Plagued by trials and tribulations throughout her long life, she clung, to paraphrase Bernanos, to the highest form of hope: despair overcome.

Yet everything had begun under the best of circumstances: Marie was born in a castle, and the families of both her parents (Charles de Fonscolombe and Alice de Romanet de Lestrange) were descended from old nobility. This was not superficial nobility, but a nobility steeped in ideals, a spirit of service, and faith.

Marie grew up surrounded by nature in the Var region of France, in a loving, open, and cultured environment. She owed her love of the arts to her father (her pillar of strength), her governess, and the Sisters of the Sacred Heart of Lyon, where she was educated.

An artistic and profound spirit

Music, painting, and poetry were more than just relaxing activities; they were companions in her joys and sorrows. It’s unfortunate that her collection of poems, vibrant echoes of her deep life, is no longer in print! And what a pity that her watercolors and pastels — some of which were acquired by the State or the Museum of Lyon — have been scattered! “You’re a great painter, Mother,” her son Antoine assured her in 1928, "a great painter of inner life. I’m very proud of you."

Marie was talented and curious. Throughout her life, whenever the opportunity arose, she went to the theater, concerts, exhibitions ... She was also intelligent, sensitive, determined, and energetic. These qualities attracted Viscount Jean de Saint-Exupéry, whom she met at a dinner party: she became his wife in 1896.

Seven years later, she was the mother of five children, three girls and two boys. During the holidays, the family would escape from Paris, where they lived, to enjoy the hospitality of a colorful aunt in Saint-Maurice-de-Rémens (Ain): her vast property enchanted the children. Antoine would dedicate some of his most beautiful pages to this place. Life was sweet, the future full of promise.

A series of bereavements

But who doesn't know that fairy tales are castles built on sand? In 1904, Jean de Saint-Exupéry died suddenly of a cerebral hemorrhage. Marie found herself alone at the age of 28 with five children ranging in age from 8 years to 18 months.

The next two decades were no less tragic. After the ordeal of World War I, in which she lost a brother-in-law and two uncles, the young widow suffered the death of two of her children. François died in 1917, struck down at the age of 15 by acute pericarditis. This episode shook his older brother Antoine so much that he referred to it in three of his books. Marie-Madeleine, the eldest, was next. She was in poor health, and finally succumbed in 1926 at the age of 29.

The next 20 years brought some respite, even if they were overshadowed by the constant worries that Saint-Exupéry's perilous missions caused his mother. She was very close to Antoine, who adored her, and she knew how much his job fulfilled him. However, she also knew how dangerous it was: the Aéropostale — the French air mail service — was a brand new venture, involving real risk-taking.

It’s easy to imagine the devastation Marie felt when Antoine disappeared at the age of 44 in July 1944, during an aerial reconnaissance mission. With no formal proof of his death, the Vicomtesse de Saint-Exupéry continued to believe that he could be alive. Perhaps he was suffering from amnesia due to the crash of his plane, or holed up in a monastery to escape the dehumanized world of “robots” that filled him with despair.

It should be noted that the wreckage of his plane was not found until 2003, almost 40 years after his mother's death.

A life given generously to others

She devoted the 27 years she had left to promoting the work of her writer son, and to her family: her two living children, four grandchildren, and 14 great-grandchildren. At the age of 96, she even had the joy of seeing the birth of her first great-great-grandson!

Until the very end, despite the progressive blindness that was her final ordeal in her last decade, she devoted her life to others, giving of herself selflessly. In this life marked by the cross, Marie courageously kept her course, and even more, was a beacon for those around her. What kept her going? Her deep faith and her dedication to serving others.

Devoted to her family, this great lady could legitimately have considered that her duty ended there. Who could’ve blamed her for enjoying the simple pleasures of life to ease her misfortunes?

But that wasn’t the case. She devoted herself wholeheartedly to her fellow human beings: with a nursing degree, she set up an infirmary for soldiers at the front in 1914-18, then a dispensary in 1919. She worked full-time for the Red Cross for two years (1927-1928), then lent a hand several days a week to the Dames du Calvaire de Lyon, who were devoted to the needy. In January of 1940, she did everything she could to become a volunteer head nurse in the Alpes-Maritimes, before organizing the reception of French refugees in her village …

The list of charitable commitments undertaken by this widow and grieving mother, whose misfortunes seemed to have brought her closer to those who were suffering most, is a long one. For decades, she also devoted one day a week to teaching catechism and manual activities to the children of the successive villages where she lived.

Her faith, her sustenance

Passing on her faith was of great importance to her! Raised in a Catholic environment, she nurtured her inner life from a young age, convinced of the goodness and closeness of the Creator. A woman of prayer, she had a particular affection for St. Francis of Assisi, whose Canticle of the Creatures she set to music so that her children could learn it more easily.

The loss of three of her children tore her apart, but she was certain she would find them again in the afterlife. If at times she had to face the dryness of the desert of the soul, she clung to hope. “There’s no need for signs to believe,” she assured Antoine, who had become agnostic. “Every believer, as I have experienced myself, has moments of doubt, of eclipse, so one must walk toward God like a blind man toward a fire, palms open, continuing one's search for the Light. Each man carries within himself something greater than himself, a particle of God dwells in every man."

In the melancholic moments of her old age, when she longed to join her dear departed, feeling useless, she set herself the task of contemplating “the divine work that no one has time to admire anymore.” At the same time, she urged her grandchildren to savor their happiness because “being consciously happy is the most beautiful grace in the world.”

If you can read French, you can learn more here: Marie de Saint-Exupéry ou l'étoile du Petit Prince, Michèle Persane-Nastorg, Triomphe, 2023, 17,90 euros.