Eccles exercises his sarcastic wit on a recent Pastoral Letter from the Bishop of Salford. I think it's Eccles' home Diocese since Eccles is the name of a town in the Diocese.
From Eccles is Saved
I've read it so you don't have to - here is a shortened version of the original text.
Dear Sisters and Brothers in Christ - also all Non-binary and Multigendered Kinspersons!Today I am writing about three different but closely-related matters of fundamental Catholic teaching.As our blessed Prime Minister, St Armer of Keir, has pointed out, all the murders, stabbings and other attacks that we have seen this summer are the fault of grumbles by far-right Conservative voters and very far-right Reform voters, and nothing to do with the people who actually committed the crimes, most of whom are peaceful healthcare workers.
It is important for us to stop these extremely far-right trouble-makers, and I take this opportunity of asking you to befriend your neighbours. Ask Mr Mohammed Ali Bayan down the road to come to Mass at my Cathedral - he won't find anything to upset his deeply-held religious beliefs!Which brings me onto my second subject. Traditionally, September is the Season of Creation, and the Church has been concerned about issues such as the Climate Crisis ever since the 1st Century C.E. (not A.D.!) You only have to look out of the window to see that the weather is hotter colder wetter drier more average than ever before! Why, the plughole in my bath was blocked this morning, causing floods in my bathroom the like of which we have not seen since last week!God - or at least St Greta - asks us to reduce our energy consumption, to install solar panels in our broom cupboards, to fit windmills under our beds, to recycle our food before eating it, and, above all, to pay more taxes!
The strain of saving the planet has taken its toll on Ms Thunberg.Finally, connected with both our community building and our care for the environment - and of course with every other important part of Catholic teaching - is SYNODALITY. I have three key questions for you:How can we persuade people that this is a real Copernican turning point of conciliar ecclesiology?What would it look like to breathe synodality into each component of academic theology?Which aspect of 'PLACE' do you think is most important in shaping relationships within the Church?I must ask that you all participate in the final stages of the synod - by attending meetings, talking a lot, or at least trying to stay awake, and by saying the Diocesan prayer "Stay with us, Lord, in our synodal walking together."
Love and kisses (as Cardinal Tucho would say),+ Johnny
Dear Sisters and Brothers in Christ - also all Non-binary and Multigendered Kinspersons!Today I am writing about three different but closely-related matters of fundamental Catholic teaching.As our blessed Prime Minister, St Armer of Keir, has pointed out, all the murders, stabbings and other attacks that we have seen this summer are the fault of grumbles by far-right Conservative voters and very far-right Reform voters, and nothing to do with the people who actually committed the crimes, most of whom are peaceful healthcare workers.
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