Stand Alone Pages on 'Musings of an Old Curmudgeon'

02 May 2024

The Six Eccles Laws

I generally enclose headlines from Eccles in satire tags, but this isn't so much satire as just humorous. He makes some great points.

From Eccles is Saved

Spending 23 hours per day on Twitter has enabled me to appreciate some fundamental truths, which need to be recognised more widely. This post is less spiritually nourishing than some, but I'll do my best.

1. Actors have nothing intelligent to say if they are not given a script, and often not even then.


Socialist actor Brian Cox calls the Bible 'one of the worst books ever' and says 'the theatre' is the 'one true church'.

2. Never click on anything described as "hilarious". It will just be mildly amusing.

A few from the Daily Mail to illustrate my point. Would you really bother with any of these?

Spilling the dirt! Hilarious moment man covers himself in soil after wheelbarrow tips over.

Plane passenger reveals his hilarious take on what your seat selection means about your journey.

We're live, guys! Hilarious moment BBC's Chris Mason realises he's standing in the wrong spot at start of live News at Six broadcast.


3. All those in positions of power in the 1960s were stark staring bonkers.

Well, you may be thinking of Beeching closing the railways, Vatican II doing untold damage to the Catholic Church, and almost any 1960s architecture:


St Horten in Ahaus, Germany. Before and after.

4. "Could" is journalese for "won't".

There are many variations on this, e.g. "explains" is journalese for "guesses".


We're doomed, do you hear me? Doomed!

Another example:


There's more than one way of being doomed.

5. Anyone with pronouns in their profile is bonkers.

I think the non-binaries are the most bonkers, but kids these days are always attracting attention, and asking to be referred to as "whee/whoosh" or whatever is probably less of a public nuisance than breaking windows.

6. Finally, applicable to religion and politics: those who rant and rage are usually wrong: those who can laugh and joke are generally right.

Rather than posting yet another picture of Pope Francis or Austen Ivereigh throwing a wobbly, let's be synodal (hmm... I feel another Eccles law coming on here...).


Nobody sensible actually enjoys synods.

No comments:

Post a Comment

Comments are subject to deletion if they are not germane. I have no problem with a bit of colourful language, but blasphemy or depraved profanity will not be allowed. Attacks on the Catholic Faith will not be tolerated. Comments will be deleted that are republican (Yanks! Note the lower case 'r'!), attacks on the legitimacy of Pope Francis as the Vicar of Christ (I know he's a material heretic and a Protector of Perverts, and I definitely want him gone yesterday! However, he is Pope, and I pray for him every day.), the legitimacy of the House of Windsor or of the claims of the Elder Line of the House of France, or attacks on the legitimacy of any of the currently ruling Houses of Europe.